October 24th 2017

Exactly two years before I was preparing to marry my best friend. The best day of my entire life followed by the best holiday. Our life as a married couple has been a little bit crazy 2 children, 1 new house, 1 dog, 1 house broken into, 2 new cars, 1 car stolen… it’s been pretty full on! Here we were our second anniversary with our second son waiting for the moment that we’d spent months dreaming of- taking him home! Lucas got the memo overnight that food was good and fed constantly meaning that the midwives were ok for us to leave. We spent a while waiting for discharge paperwork (probably about 4 hours altogether!) with Glen constantly asking “can we go, can we go now?, why are they taking so long? When can we go home?” on repeat for about 4 hours. He was excited. We all were although maybe not Lucas at this point who was more interested in being fed. Before leaving I’d mastered important steps such as getting out of bed, showering, getting dressed and walking small distances. All of this done in complete agony but it was progress all the same! Finally the moment came and this was Lucas’ reaction- 

Every time I stopped feeding him he did this! We realised that if we didn’t take the plunge we’d be there all day. So there we were with our screaming baby making a swift (as swift as you can after major abdominal surgery) exit for the ward. It felt a bit surreal and I was partly convinced that somebody would stop us leaving before we got to the exit! Despite this the moment was every bit as wonderful as I’d imagined. Here we were leaving the hospital with gorgeous baby Lucas! 

I’m sure this is a great moment for any parent but not having the opportunity to do this with Eli the year before made me appreciate the moment so so much. One of the best moments ever (not sure Lucas agreed as he looked fed up of our company already 😂🙈). We made it to the car park Glen walking and me hobbling somewhere behind and I started freaking out a bit. Lucas had gone from screaming to very quiet in such a short succession of time and I was worried as I couldn’t hear him he’d stopped breathing. We’d made it this far and I was worried (again) that we wouldn’t really make it home. I think after an anxious 9 months it was difficult to turn those worries off completely. Thankfully all was well and we set off on our journey home ready to be a family ❤️. When we were at home the exhaustion really started to hit me. As much as I wanted to soak up every moment I felt like the walking dead and as Lucas was asleep I took the opportunity for a nap. I think I maybe slept for about an hour before waking up in a complete panic and wanting to make sure that Lucas was ok. He was happily cuddling his Daddy on the sofa. For a while both of us sat watching him and this was when the emotions of the past few days had started to catch up with me and the tears started to flow. He was really here and for the first time in a very very long time I took a deep breath and took in the enormity of the moment. 

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